Tuesday, July 11, 2006

My Joy or The Vocabulary of Failure 

I had never bothered to look up the word Happy in the dictionary before. Does anybody bother to look up that word? I thought I knew what it meant. A friend once asked me, "Are you happy?" When is the last time you asked someone that question? I looked up 'happy' and this is what it said; "Happy adj. 1) Lucky; fortunate 2) having, showing or causing great pleasure or joy 3) suitable and clever; apt".

Where is the happiness I thought I knew? How can anyone feel these things all the time? Who is lucky? I don't believe in luck. I no longer believe in my idea of happiness. It doesn't exist, it's an illusion. It seems we have been sold on an idea of happiness all our lives and by adopting this word we have set ourselves up for failure. Well no more! I am removing it from my vocabulary. Now, I feel joy - sometimes - or clever or apt - on occasion - but no more "happiness".

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